Birth Story Part One

*** Disclaimer: This is a BIRTH story - if anything about birth mightgross you out, I wouldn't read it. Also, we're a funny bunch, if you can'thandle a little hilarity (and inappropriateness), I'd avoid this alltogether. ***Our birth story is a combination of Nick's funny comments/my sister andmom's hourly updates/me filling in the blank when they got too excited towrite. My comments are written in paranthesis - that's the real story.The timeline begins on Tuesday the 30th. We actually went into labor onFriday the 26th. We went to the hospital at 4:00 am on the 27th but thesent us home because labor just wasn't progressing. They warned us thatthe baby refused to descend into my birth canal despite the strength of mycontractions because his head was too big. They told us to come in onMonday to check the progress and they'd make a decision then. (We met withmidwife Beverly that day)On Monday we met with midwife Lynn who gave us the same synopsis. They dida quick ultrasound and confirmed that the baby was huge (they estimated 9pounds, 7 ounces) and asked us to come in the next morning to put me onPitocin to see if we could make the baby descend. Nick and I were excitedand nervous but we spent the rest of the day getting the house ready,packing our bags, having coffee with friends, and enjoying a last mealalone....now the timeline starts....(January 30th) Nick's notes, mine in paranthesis7:15 IV's, etc. etc.7:20 PRAYER for Elias and jess. Also I took amazing pictures of my wife...but she did not like it. (it wasn't amazing, I deleted it)7:32 The nurse felt up my wife or checked her cervix. She was in there fora long time! j/k I love you Jess - you said I couldn't make verbal jokes... but you didn't say I couldn't write them7:55 Pitocin begins! Yes! After all the feeling up, still only 1 cm8:05 Jess said she looked pretty (at this point, I had curled my hair anddone my makeup - there was nothing else to do but grunt) I agree. However,I just want to keep track of how many times she says it today.8:25 Midwife was pleased with Cervix (that was midwife Cindy) said thebabies head was -2. I don't know what that means, but she was happy.9:45 Increased medication9:50 Checked for dilated, no change9:50 Katie called and said they were on their way10:10 Randy (my dad) came back from a cup of coffee - it took awhile sothat could mean 1) really a cup of coffee 2)golf 3) smoke break and coffee10:55 Kt and Josh called again... still have not left! What the heck?(by this point, mom and dad were both there - plus my Nana and Nick'sNana. The contractions were slightly brutal by then and I wanted to go aslong as possible without medication so Nana's were in the waiting room,Dad left whenever I was in too much pain - and Mom was by my side)... now Katie takes over the timeline ...2:00 katie and Josh got here at 1:30. They almost got a divorce becauseJosh was taking so long. Katie couldn't talk to Josh - she was tooexcited. Boys are gone, we are taking over the journal because Nick can'twrite legibly. Katie can't spell but atleast it's legible.2:00 Jessi likes peeing. (It made the contractions less bad for somereason) She's starving and has said the word fry 5 times since I startedwriting. (I was starving - they finally let me eat but it didn't tastegood because I was in so much pain) Now she's talking TV schedules. 3 -Tyra, 4 - Oprah, 5 - Ellen. She says we have our whole afternoon busy. Hercontractions are a 7/10 on a pain scale. She may not have her eyes open by3:00 - more to come.... this is what I supplemented in that night ...Labor continued to increase and we made it to 4 centimeters and 80%effaced. Contractions got up to a 140 (150 is when you begin pushing) andlabor got a little hairy but still bareable. At Eight PM Midwife Cindydecided we should quit for tonight - turn off the pitocin and give mesleeping medicine to sleep through the contractions. The plan is to startPitocin again at 6 am, break the water at 7:30am. Beverly is the midwifetomorrow. We had some good laughs with her and Cindy. They came by and putme at ease. Mere & Steph drove from Columbia to visit. They'll miss allthe action tomorrow but they'll be back soon. Tessie, Kal, & Stace cameand they'll all be back tomorrow. Nick is staying with me, Katie, Josh, &Dad are staying at my house and mom is at Nana's.The plan is still no epidural tomorrow and I feel good about it. I'm somuch less scared than I was this morning. Each contraction is sopurposeful and God has his hand all over this day. I want tomorrow to beElias' day. I want it to be all about him and about celebrating the Godwho made him.That night, labor slowed down a little but the contractions were stillstrong. I went to bed at midnight and finally stopped trying to sleep at4am. While I waited for Nick to wake up and the fam to get there, I made adelivery playlist on the computer, picked some scripture to read duringbirth, and wrote Elias a letter.